I feel great compassion for you and your long struggle with depression and illness. The timing of the onset of your emotional and physical symptoms, shortly after the loss of your parents, is probably significant. Energies systems can go into shock after significant loss or trauma, and it is not unusual for the pattern that was initially in response to the shock to become stuck in the body. This type of quagmire, in fact, traps more people than you might realize. I would suggest that you read about triple warmer in Chapter 8 of Energy Medicine as it governs both your response to trauma and your energy habits.
While I cannot provide you with suggestions that are attuned to your unique energies, the following sequence can help to release the energy patterns caused by shock that can become stuck in the body:
First, calm triple warmer with the "smoothing behind the ears" movement described on pp. 235 – 236. This is an excellent way of taking down the stress level and helping to break the energy habits that maintain depression.
Second, you may need more "space" in your body for your energies to flow. This can be created in numerous ways. One of the best is called "Separating Heaven and Earth" (p. 248). This not only stretches your physical body, it gets your energy moving through it.
Third, Your energy may have become homolateral (i.e., running in parallel lines instead of crossing and weaving as is needed for optimal health.). If this is the case, you are fighting an uphill battle with only a fraction of the energy that could be available to you. Doing the Homolateral crossover (pp. 233 – 235) two times per day should help coax your energy into a more functional pattern.
Fourth, I recommend that you have someone clear your chakras on a regular basis (Chapter 5). This can often facilitate healing on much deeper levels.
Next, you might add Heaven Rushing In, described on page 23, to help you with the spiritual dimension of healing, and to help you not feel so alone.
These techniques should be helpful to you, and you should experience greater benefit from the "Daily Energy Routine" after you have done them for even a few days.
Regarding clearing your neurolymphatics, the problem you experienced, feeling worse rather than better, is because these points help physical and energetic toxins break free so they can move out of our body. But if you have a toxin build-up in your body, massaging the points can move too many toxins into the lymph system and blood stream too quickly, resulting in feeling sick from all the toxins. The fact that the technique made you ill, if you understand the principle, is a signal of how much you needed it. So you might start with just one or two points. This is not likely to overwhelm your system. Once some of the toxins have been dislodged and eliminated, and your overall energy system grows stronger, your body will more readily tolerate neurolymphatic massage.
Because I am suggesting a relatively complex set of procedures, and your symptoms are also complex and longstanding, you might seriously consider consulting an energy medicine practitioner to assess your energies, give you some treatments, and also to supervise your back-home routines.
If your physical and emotional health is still slow to improve after following these suggestions, there is one other energy system that should be investigated. It may be that your basic grid needs to be woven back together. This work definitely requires an experienced practitioner's help. I've written a little about it in Chapter 6. Both emotional and physical trauma can create the equivalent of ruptures and weak spots in a person's basic grid, and if this foundational energy system is not in reasonable shape, it is harder for the other techniques to work well. You can find a qualified grid practitioner by searching for an Advanced Practitioner in our EEM Certified Practitioner Directory.